There's a lot going on in our household these days....
Lukas is now seven and a half months old. He's definitely all boy and never slows down but I can honestly say we're soaking him up. We may have had a rough "go" of things for his first few months of life but over the past two months, things have been remarkably better. (Granted, he's still not sleeping through the night, but we've just succumbed to that.) He's a boy on the move and he does something new everyday. His hair has finally filled in and I can say that he's officially a "toehead".... maybe even moreso than his sister is! We have four teeth in place but unfortunately he looks a little like Dracula as his top I-teeth decided to come in before his top middle teeth. I'd say he's a sight for sore eyes when he smiles but really, we just get a kick out of how goofy he looks with this arrangement right now. :)
Liana is three and sassy as ever. There have been a few days where her and I have just battled it out all day long. She's bossy, rude at times, and full of attitude. While the struggle has just begun, the moments that make it all worth it look something like, "Mommy, I love you. You're my best friend." (All the while wrapping her sweet little arms around me.)
But our biggest news is this... we've decided to put our house on the market.
Mike and I have been discussing this for some time now. I love our house, I love our neighbors, I love the area that we live in. But this house doesn't offer us everything we need and in some ways, it offers too much. As of June 8th, we've been in this house for four years. When we bought it, having a family still seemed so far away but we wanted to be prepared for what was to come. We bought this house with the idea that we would never have to move out as it had more than enough room for us and whatever our family would end up looking like. Before we knew it though, we found out we were pregnant with Liana. Three years later we're faced with the reality that we live in a school district that has some downfalls. Now granted, I'm sure all districts do, but this one has some pretty particular ones that leave us feeling uneasy. While we battled with the idea of doing school of choice (as most of our neighbors have done), we ultimately decided that it was time to do something different. Our decision was made easier by the fact that like I said, this house isn't exactly what we want/need it to be.
So as of Tuesday, our house is up for sale and reality is setting in.
I woke up Tuesday feeling pretty sad & incredibly nostalgic. I walked from room to room, snapping pictures and looking at the home we've created here. I couldn't help but think about the fact that this is the home we brought both of our babies home to. This is the home we painted every square inch of to make it our own. This is the home Mike and I grew in as individuals, as a couple, and as a family. This is the home we poured ourselves (and our money!) into for the past four years.
Over the past few days, I've constantly questioned whether we're doing the right thing. But then I think about the possibilities that lie ahead.... a neighborhood that includes kids Liana & Lukas's age that they can play with. A new home that is just what we need. Being just a bit closer to our families again. Not having to worry about whether the kids are getting the education & experiences they need.
These things excite me. They give me hope for something just a little bit better than we already have.
Once again, our goal is to make this next move our last. We know what we need & want in a house and we know what we want to avoid. We're going into it with a wealth of knowledge we didn't have when we bought this house as it has taught us so many (maybe too many!) lessons on home ownership. We're leaning towards buying new construction or if we have to, building ourselves. The biggest reason that we're hoping to go this route is because we're looking to avoid any more surprises and we want to "know" what we're getting. We've both found a floor plan we love but so far, no homes for sale that go along with it.
For a person who's typically anxious about everything, this has brought me to a new level of feeling unsettled. We're not sure what we'll do if our house sells quickly and we don't have something else lined up. We may move in with my sister or we may decide to rent. I just keep trying to have faith that this will all work out just as it's supposed to. God's plans are usually much, much bigger and greater than mine after all.
Whenever this home sells, I know I'll be overcome with emotion. I know I'll have doubts and I'll continue to question whether we did the right thing. It will be one of the most bittersweet times of my life. However, I keep reminiding myself to "keep my eyes on the prize" and hope that whatever comes next is just as wonderful.... if not better.
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