I have to say that my time with you these days is very bittersweet.
Bitter because I know this "just me and you" time is going to quickly come to an end. That you're life is going to change in ways that you cannot even fathom with the addition of a new baby brother. That in 12 weeks or less, you will have to share your mommy and daddy with someone who needs us just as much as you do.... if not more. And sharing us is something you've never had to do before.
And we also have bitter moments. Like when you throw tantrums because I put the wrong pair of shoes on you. Or the wrong diaper on you. (God forbid it have JUST Mickey Mouse on it and not Mickey AND Minnie! Anyone who knew me as a child can understand why this is paybacks for what I put my own mother through so many years ago.) Oh, and lets not forget those moments when my body is exhausted and I'm just trying to get you into the car but instead, you insist on running from me like it's your job... yeah, those are my favorites. Not.
But the bitter moments are far outweighed by the sweet ones. Like when you give me hugs and kisses without me having to ask and all the other affection you now show at 28 months. The fact that I'm officially your favorite parent and daddy knows it. (Though I reassure him that his time will come too.) The way you carry on complete conversations with me and say things that I'm simply astounded by. (ie.... "Mommy, I so happy right now" as you give me the worlds best hug.) How you've become a domestic diva and now like to pretend cook, clean, and take care of your baby doll. Seeing you make the transition from sleeping in your crib to a "big girl bed" rather effortlessly and without any tears. Having our mornings together completely transformed as you not only climb into bed with me to snuggle, but we can easily spend an hour there together watching Mickey or Jake & The Neverland Pirates. Not to mention the way you fit so perfectly as my little spoon and you love it when I just run my fingers across the length of your arm.... it gets you every time.
Want more? You are crazy about having your toes painted. The minute you see that I'm going to repaint my own, you're all over it. After much practice, you've learned how to sit very still until they dry too! Once they are, you show them off to everyone and anyone. How about the way you love on your baby brother before he's even born and find so much curiosity in this growing belly of mine. (According to you, Mommy has a baby boy in her belly, you have a baby girl in yours, and Daddy has a dog in his! Oh the things you say these days...) And watching you love on your dogs too. Over the past few weeks, you've taken a keen liking to Bauer which is honestly something I didn't expect. Moose has always been the one to play with you while Bauer layed around and simply watched you. But these days, you've found the magic in our "older and wiser" dog and you shower him with the hugs and kisses he adores. I can tell he's become a little more smitten with you lately, too! At 28 months, you sing like it's your job. In the car, in the bath, when you're alone in your playroom or because you want to put on a show. I joked with daddy yesterday and said you're going to be the next Taylor Swift as you walked around with your maracas and sang us one of your many songs. A mama can dream, right?! Your list of your current favorites: Barney's "I Love You" theme song, Baa Baa Black Sheep, ABC's, "It's a happy spring day...." from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Old McDonald Had a Farm (this was all you sang for WEEKS in the car.... I started to go nuts!), and B-I-N-G-O.
These days, you eat pretty consistently. A decent breakfast and then a good lunch or dinner... but never both. You have the same sweet tooth your mama does and you crave carbs just the same, as well. We tried potty training briefly this month but you made it pretty obvious that you just weren't ready. Rather than pushing the subject, we figured it'd be best to just wait until you're ready. While we had hoped you'd be quite the waterbug this year, you definitely are not. The only pool you like is the baby pool we bought for you last summer (it holds only 3-4 inches of water) and though you're willing enough to step into it, the moment your bathing suit becomes wet you demand to be changed into your clothes. In addition, you hate when anyone else is in the water too.... if you see someone in the pool, you whimper and fuss while saying "[Insert name here) clothes on?"
A few of your new skills? Identifying both letters and numbers by sight. I show you a 3, you know it's a 3. I show you the letter Y, you know it's the letter Y. My child, you're brilliant. :)
So thankfully, I've watched you slowly blossom into more of a social butterfly just within the past six weeks. Throughout the past six months, you were painfully shy towards kids or adults. While you're still a bit shy towards the adults you don't see regularly, you're adjusting when it comes to playing with other kids. Playgroup used to be difficult because you'd go off on your own and mostly play by yourself. If we went to a playground and other kids took an interest in you, you'd remain quiet until they eventually just ran off to play with someone else. But lately? You've participated. You've interacted. You've made new friends which has left this mama's heart very, very happy. Nothing brings me more joy than seeing you enjoy yourself and not be attached to my hip for security. I pray that you continue to blossom in this way as I know firsthand how painful it is as a kid to be the shy one.
Some current favorites: Swinging. You'd swing for hours if we let you.... literally. "Orange" cereal... aka Honey Bunches of Oats. Second runner up is Frosted Mini Wheats. Curious George cartoons. The color purple... which is why your "big girl room" is the most beautiful lavender I could find. And you love it. :) Being turned "upside down". Cats. You LOVE cats! This is why we take so many trips over to Auntie Brittany's house to see Sophie and Amaya. Chocolate milk. Blanket.... and only the fleece one I made you which is definitely more suitable during the winter months, but you insist on using it in July.
Liana Grace, 28 months is wonderful. You may be posing us with some challenges as you learn to exert your new found independence but you are still the sweetest little girl and I still love you to the moon and back. I worry that your brother will get the "short end of the stick" so to speak because I find myself doubting that I can love anyone as much as I love you... but I also find reassurance that the love in my heart won't divide once he's born, it'll multiply. My heart leaps at the thought of you having your own "someone" in this great big world as I think a sibling relationship gives us "someone" we can always love, trust, and depend upon, no matter what. My heart also leaps at the mere thought of how much you could love this little guy and how you'll likely find so much purpose in him yourself.
One more thing....
I understand now how a firstborn has such a special place in their mother's heart.
You opened me up to a love I never knew existed. You made me want more. You turned Daddy and me into a family. You changed the person I was into the person I now am.... very much for the better. My life is no longer lived for myself. It's lived for you. And soon, your brother too. But all of these things? They're things only you could have done as my first child.
Liana Grace, I love you. Happy 28 months, baby girl. <3
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